My Last Three Weeks Of Life (from Alexis' perspective)

Hi Everyone- Just wanted to apologize for not blogging for the last three weeks. I've had a double ear infection, a fever, my butt keeps exploding for some reason, and I've been busy wrapping up my first school year with Debbie. Now that the summer has begun and I'm starting to feel better, my daddy and I have lots of time to waste on this silly blog.

I apologize for the sideways video. Did you know I'm barely seven months old? Give me a break. I don't need to tell you that my daddy isn't much help in the area of technology, either. Just turn your computer sideways and that can be a simple solution.

This video was the result of my mommy and daddy being bored and using me for entertainment purposes only. They gave me some sort of pickle thingy that tasted really bad. Before doing so, Daddy ran to get the camera so he could get some footage. It's almost like they knew ahead of time that I wasn't going to like it and had an idea that I might make some sort of weird face. I always want to make them proud, so I didn't disappoint and made a weird face just for their amusement. The pickle actually wasn't all that bad.

I've also been practicing my hand/eye coordination as Daddy tells me that's important if I want to be a soccer star. I've started with relatively low expectations, working solely on getting my food into my mouth. I used to be way off, mainly depositing the food into my eyeballs or ear drums. Lately, Daddy says I'm hitting over .400, whatever that means. Whatever the case, I really enjoy it when I get a star into my mouth all by myself.

As for my parents, they've been busy. They dropped me off at Debbie's one day a couple of weeks ago, but I sensed something was weird as they were both with me and they had packed their bags with swimsuits and towels. I knew something was up when Grammy Eldred came to pick me up. It turns out that my parents decided to bring other kids to an amusement park for Daddy's end-of-the-year class trip. I've given them the silent treatment for two weeks now and plan on not talking to them for another five months. I'm really upset with them.

As I'm really upset with my parents, I don't mind telling you about their pathetic garden. All that time and energy they put in was pretty much wasted as mother nature has not cooperated with their plans. Daddy thought it was great at first when he never had to water the garden as it rained every day, but now he's complaining as the garden is a small lake and the never ending ridiculous storms continue to come. I sometimes poop my pants when a loud strike of thunder rattles the house. I think it's funny when this happens.

So, besides my inability to control my bowels and my chest cold that won't go away, life for me is grand. Daddy promises to do a better job keeping current with this blog. Until then, I hope you are all doing well. Thanks for listening to me rant. My parents simply lock me in a closet when I start complaining here at home.

Like my daddy, I'm pretty vain... so here's some pictures of myself: